How I got my Agent

Dear Reader / Writer / Creative / Mysterious Internet Specter, 

2020 has been a bizarre year. So many twists and turns, so many spontaneous pitfalls, and the days somehow pass in both the blink of an eye and at a snail’s pace. Signing with an agent is the best possible Plot Twist—it’s been a ray of sunshine in what has been a stormy, uncertain year.

But wait, wait. I’ve started this story in the muddy middle. Let me go back to the beginning. I’ll skim past the childhood prologue (spoilers: I was a writer then too, and I spent my time writing SAILOR MOON X TEEN TITANS stories about superheroes, trying out character voices on my long-suffering sister, and rambling about my characters to anyone who would listen), and move on to…

CHAPTER ONE: Chelsea finishes “A Novel!” 

I’ve been writing my whole life, but I finished the first draft of my first novel in 2015—it was 447k words. I know what you’re thinking: Chelsea, that’s not a novel, that’s a SERIES. Ha, if only! Even though that book was a mess, I was so proud of it because it was my first completed novel manuscript. There were two things that gave me the discipline to finish that draft: 

 1)    The support of a dear friend of mine, whom I now fondly call The Best Critique Partner 

2)    NaNoWriMo, which inspired me to just DO THE THING, NO LOOKING BACK

My CP and I have been friends since 2015. I actually didn’t call her my CP until I joined Twitter because I didn’t know what a CP was. Anyway, the two of us don’t have a typical CP relationship. We don’t critique each other while we draft—we cheer each other on! If you’re reading this: bless you, Jas, for reading all of my terrifyingly long first drafts and for being the first to believe in my fictional kids <3 

Anyway, back to the terrible first draft. I bet you’re wondering what I did with it when I was done. The answer is…nothing. I finished that draft, plopped it in a folder, and started on another first draft. The second completed manuscript I wrote was 770k (I scream every time I open that document). After that, I wrote a third story; this one was 350k words. 

Did you ever think about publishing them? you ask. Or maybe: Why are you LIKE this? 

The answer to that first question is “no.” I knew those drafts weren’t ready to be picked apart, and even more than that, I didn’t want to tear them apart. The reason I wrote so many first drafts without thinking to edit them? I wanted to play. I wanted to write without expectations, without having the word “marketability” looming over my head like a scythe. I wanted to fall head over heels in love with my writing so that when I finally felt it was time to pursue publication, having other people tear my work apart wouldn’t obliterate my confidence as a writer.

Back then, “querying” was a vague concept. I knew I had to do it eventually if I wanted to get an agent, but I wasn’t writing to get published when I finished my first novel. I was writing for me. I don’t regret jumping from draft to draft in those years because I loved doing it. And at the end of the day, I think that’s the most valuable lesson I’ve learned as a writer: you have to be your own cheerleader first. Comparing yourself to other people on social media can make that difficult.

That being said, the Twitter writing community has done so much to inspire me as a writer, and I’m so glad I became a part of it while I was drafting THE STARDUST THIEF. That’s the first book I edited and queried—and also the book that got me my agent. 

CHAPTER TWO: THE STARDUST THIEF 

Where to begin with THE STARDUST THIEF? For a long time, I’d wanted to write a book that touched on the culture and stories I grew up with. When I was a kid, my dad used to tell me and my sister stories about jinn and magic. Of virtuous thieves and wily sailors. I used to fall asleep listening to stories of Sinbad, and when the next night came, I’d wait with great anticipation for the story to continue.

Year after year I hesitantly revisited the idea of writing an “Arabian fantasy” before shying away. Forget other peoples’ expectations, I had high expectations for this yet-to-be-conceptualized story. And then one day, quite spontaneously, an image hit me with the force of a lightning bolt: I was listening to a Cirque du Soleil soundtrack when I was saw, in my mind’s eye, a smirking merchant on a ship, a coin dancing across her knuckles. A shadow loomed behind her—her bodyguard, whom I immediately knew was a jinn.

Who ARE these people? I thought. That question, that interest, was the beginning of STARDUST. The characters came to me in vivid snippets, scenes I archived in my head and started slowly but surely slotting into the story like puzzle pieces. I pantsed the majority of the first draft which came out to (…. wait for it…) 297k words! 

CHAPTER THREE: AND NOW, ON TO EDITS…

I was an emotional mess when I finished this first draft. Was it rough? Yes. Was it terrifyingly long and barely readable? Also yes. (Again, my CP has the patience of a saint for reading every single word) But I had a feeling about THE STARDUST THIEF, a sense I’d written something other people might like to read. 

The thing is: I had no idea how to edit. I’d edited short stories and scripts before, but never a freakishly long manuscript. Where did I even start?? This was when the Twitter writing community became an invaluable resource for me. I joined Twitter while I was about 70% of the way through writing my first draft, and I’d made, much to my eternal shock, REALLY GREAT, REALLY INSPIRATIONAL WRITING FRIENDS. 

Never listen to those people who say writing is a solitary process. Writing is an inherently collaborative effort. Writers need second (and third, and fourth, and fifth…) opinions. They need a team of people who understand their vision and want to help them build and polish it. And I am so, so grateful I found the beginnings of that team on Twitter. 

But still—while I was eager to get eyes on my draft, I didn’t want to send it out before I felt I’d done everything I could to make it shine. So I turned to my behemoth draft, took a deep breath, and basically tore out my still-beating heart while revising. I cut more plot points than I could count, two major characters, and more than 150k words. I reverse-outlined the whole story (outlining the chapters as I reread) and chopped anything that didn’t contribute anything meaningful to the story. 

My second draft was 147k words. Thinking about how much better I made the story even in that first edit makes my heart swell with pride. But well, it wasn’t anywhere near done. After reading and rereading (x5 times) THAT draft, I sent it out to beta readers. And while I waited for responses, I dove even deeper into the strange space that is Writing Twitter. I discovered pitch contests, querying resources, and “How I got my Agent” posts. For the first time in my life, I tentatively pictured myself embarking on the same journey.

Then my critique came back in. And yay, people liked the story! …but it needed a lot of work. I’d been in critique workshops before, but this was the first time I’d gotten critique on a story I’d poured so much of myself into. It was both exhilarating and painful. Some of the critique cut me down to my core but, well—I was glad for it. I wanted people to tell me the truth. I didn’t want empty flattery; I wanted them to point out the issues so I could fix them, and make the story the best it could possibly be.

THE STARDUST THIEF went through multiple rounds of edits. Every time I got antsy looking at the pitch contests and writers in the query trenches, I forcefully turned my eyes away and thought: “Eyes on your own page. You’ll get there when you’re ready.” If I was going to send this story into the query trenches, I wanted to be 100% proud of it. What was the point of sending it out if I didn’t give it everything I had?

I edited THE STARDUST THIEF for a long time. I cut, added, cried, strangled my characters, and chopped SO many darlings until I got it down to 122k words. And finally, after 2+ years of working on the manuscript, I threw it into the void that is the query trenches.

CHAPTER FOUR: THE QUERY TRENCHES

First off, before I get any further in this, I want to mention that I got some really great questions about querying on Twitter and that, instead of answering them in this post, I opted to create a separate Query Q/A page. So if you’re interested in things like the steps I took to prepare my agent list and the resources I used to do so, give it a look—I really hope it’s helpful! 

But I digress: This is probably the part of the story you came here for. Took me long enough to get here, right? But I’ll confess right off the bat that the querying trenches was the shortest part of this journey for me. It was also easily the most emotional stage, so if you’re getting ready to query—PSYCHE YOURSELF UP!! GET PUMPED!! (Also, I’m sending you all the positive vibes!!)

*clears throat* Anyway. People seem to like querying stats, so here are mine!

QUERYING STATS:

Time in trenches: 56 days

Queries sent: 21

Full requests: 12

Offers of rep: 3

Technically, my querying journey began with a pitch contest on Twitter—#PitMad—because that was when I sent out my first queries. But there are things I did to prep for querying even before #PitMad. Author Mentor Match is a mentorship program that pairs aspiring authors together with agented/published authors. At the end of last year, I’d done multiple rounds of beta readers on my manuscript and was excited to shoot my shot with AMM. I prepped a query and synopsis, read my sample pages a million times, and sent in my query package. And then I waited!

And waited…and waited…and waited.

I knew there were only so many mentors, and a limited amount of mentees. And yet, one can know the low odds and still feel defeated by them. As weeks went by, I crumbled in on myself. I knew the chances of getting chosen were very low, but I’d been holding out hope someone would see potential in my pages and be interested in asking for more. 

Those requests never came, and the mentors offered a slew of reasons: it was a matter of finding the right fit (it always is!), a matter of finding a writer that knew how to help, and sometimes, the manuscript either needed a lot of work and wasn’t ready for AMM or, conversely, it was polished enough to be queried! Understandably, most mentors weren’t able to offer specific reasons to applicants because they were so busy, so I never knew why people didn’t connect to my manuscript. 

…Psst, this is exactly what the querying trenches feel like ;)

That’s why, even though there was no interest in my pages, AMM was an extremely helpful experience, and I’m so glad I participated! It gave me a taste of the query trenches, connected me to fellow aspiring writers and, most importantly, gave me the drive to write a draft for a query and synopsis. I ended up building on both of those drafts when I was prepping to query, and I met so many fantastic writers in the process. Outside of AMM, I also joined a writing critique group where I met writers who helped me tear my query package apart. They gave me some of the best advice I’ve ever received, including “Know what you want from an agent.” and “Remember that you are so much more than this one project.” (I’m paraphrasing, but that’s the gist!)

I’m so, so grateful for the community support I had when I jumped into querying. Having writing friends that I could send questions to and celebrate my wins with was/is incredible. When you find those supportive people, keep them close—this a hard industry, and those people are treasures :)

Anyway, I talk a little bit more about the specifics of my querying experience on the Q/A page, but here’s the more concise, sappy version: I officially started querying after #PitMad. I joined the pitch contest, got an overwhelming amount of support on Twitter (which to this day, I am so insanely grateful for), and sent my first batch of queries and fulls to agents who liked my tweet. I waited with baited breath to see what the reception would be like, and was shocked when requests for fulls started coming in. Then I waited, again, with baited breath.

I was watching Spider Man: Into the Spiderverse for the first time with my family when I got my first offer of representation a little more than 40 days in.

I remember sitting there staring numbly at my laptop before my family noticed I was being weirdly quiet and asked me why I was making strange faces at my screen. What followed was a whole lot of emotion: tears and smiles and screaming and hugs. That moment will forever be frozen in my mind—I’m still so happy I had the opportunity to celebrate that moment with my family when, only months ago, I’d been working in New York and anticipating sending them text updates they’d receive later in the day because of weird timezones. I started querying in Pennsylvania, where I’d escaped to stay with some friends shortly after the pandemic hit. I had absolutely no idea I’d be able to fly back to Kuwait and be with family when things started happening in the query trenches. It’s been incredible sharing this journey with them when they’ve always been so supportive of my storytelling. Truly a blessing <3

Anyway—I set up my first agent call the day after I got the offer, and spoke to an incredible agent. Nothing could prepare me for the moment where that agent told me she loved my work. As writers, we’re so accustomed to pitching our work to people, so having your story pitched back at you with so much enthusiasm is…bewildering. A truly incredible, heartwarming feeling that disturbs your equilibrium in the best way. After I got off the phone, I sent nudges to other agents and waited for two weeks—that seems to be the industry standard, give or take—to see if any other agents would be interested in my work. I was a mess of nerves and excitement!

Before those two weeks were up, I received (a) some incredibly kind rejections, (b) passes from agents who weren’t able to read the manuscript by the deadline and (c) Two! More! Offers! I was stunned all over again and, just like I’d been on the first call, I was an emotional mess when speaking with those agents. All three agents had very different visions for THE STARDUST THIEF. The agent I signed with—Jennifer Azantian—had the vision that resonated with me most.

When Jennifer gave me her suggestions, I was nodding excitedly the whole time. Her suggested edits required me to untangle my plot lines and restructure them in ways I hadn’t considered; they forced me to look deeper, into the heart of my story. And I loved that. I hadn’t realized this going into the query trenches, but because all of the agents I spoke to had very different editorial styles (more about this on the Q/A), I was able to get a sense of what working with each would be like. And I realized I wanted an agent who could dig deep into the story with me, someone who could offer suggestions that would challenge me to see it in new ways. When I spoke to Jennifer on the phone I kept thinking, Yes! She gets it!! and that was extremely exciting!

Also: my call with Jennifer didn’t feel like an interview. It felt like a conversation, and I was able to talk about not just what I wanted to do with THE STARDUST THIEF but also, what I wanted to accomplish with all my writing. We talked about other projects I had planned, and what sorts of things inspired those stories. The call wasn’t just about my queried manuscript—it was about me, the writer. I got off that phone call and I was excited and nervous and INSPIRED.

I accepted Jennifer’s offer the day after my deadline. Before that, I spoke to every offering agents’ clients, thought deeply about the direction I wanted to go with my story, and pterodactyl-shrieked at my ceiling.

In the end, I couldn’t be happier about the decision I made. Getting to this stage has been a dream of mine since I was a kid, and I am so absurdly grateful to everyone who inspired me to keep reaching for it. A huge thank you to all of you wonderful writers on Writing Twitter—you’ve kept me afloat during this process, and I am so, so grateful for your interest in my work and for your friendship. I’m cheering you all on, and I cannot wait to celebrate your accomplishments <3 I’m also thankful to everyone who read my work—beta readers, family, friends and agents. Thank you for letting my characters live in your head, even if it was only for a little bit :)

CHAPTER FIVE: …AND ONWARDS!

Wherever you are in this process: You’ve got this. Everyone’s journey is different, and each is impressive and inspiring in its own way. Don’t compare yourself to others; writing isn’t a race or a competition. Celebrate every milestone you reach, because writing is HARD and you should be excited about every win. As writers, the only thing we can control is our own work: writing it, editing it, revising it, querying it.

Good luck, everyone, and may the muse be with you! :)

Chelsea